Cyclops Turtle Collection

Behold the Neon Cyclops Turtle—glowing like a radioactive disco ball and staring into your soul with its single hyper-judgmental eye.

This is not merch; this is a lifestyle choice. Wear it, carry it, hang it on a wall, and watch bystanders question both reality and their life decisions. If you’ve ever wanted a fluorescent one-eyed turtle spirit guide, congratulations. Your moment has arrived.